In August, I remember just going about my usual day when this thought came to mind. “This is going to be an unusual year. Get ready to lay your normal schedule aside.” It was as if I was being warned ahead of time not to be surprised but to be ready to shift some things in my life. My assumption, immediately, was that my father, who is 92, was going to need extra care and that I may be spending more time back and forth to SD where he lives. I felt as though I was not to allow this to upset me but to just go with the flow of what would be happening.
Then, on the morning of Sept. 10th, I walked into my little prayer nook (a space designated just for prayer), sat down and began to worship. I like to worship for a time and then sit and listen. On that particular morning in Sept, our life took a turn when I heard the Lord say, “This family (mine) has been marked by fear but I am about to change that and I am going to shift you from fear to faith. You will be known for your faith in God and your ability to trust.” It was several hours later that I received the report that my husband had moved from stage 3 kidney disease (which he has had for several years and is manageable) to stage 5 in a matter of three months. Stage 5 means that he would be facing dialysis and would need a new kidney. I know that God does not send sickness…I am firm in my faith on that, but He will use anything in our lives in order to bring Christlikeness. From that moment on, our lives began to change and our new season was set in motion. I called and texted everyone I knew to begin praying; I googled everything I could about kidney disease and diet. The information was overwhelming; the doctor’s appointments mounted up and it was then, that I knew we were definitely moving into a year of the unknown. During this time, my father also took a turn for the worse and I now had two major life changing events going at the same time.
.All our grandchildren
Instead of trying to write everything in one day, I will post periodically as we go through this journey specifically so that I can process what the Lord is saying. I know one thing is for certain: We have to take only one day at a time. I am a futuristic person… It is my nature. I have never been very good in the moment. I always have a vision for the future. However, in this season… I have no choice. God gives us grace for the moment. My husband and I have grace for the day and we cannot look to tomorrow except with hope that God has all of this in His hands and we are only to TRUST AND OBEY….. There is no other way.
Will continue to write in a few days. I want to add that we could not be walking in peace in this storm without the grace of God and the amazing amount of prayer that has been coming our way. Thank you to all of our friends who are holding our arms and praying us through. You rock this world! OH, BY THE WAY! WE ARE STILL BELIEVING FOR OUR MIRACLE! SO PRAY FOR A MIRACLE KIDNEY!
Thanks for listening and allowing me time to process. I know there are people who have gone through so much more than I can imagine, but in a every journey, we walk holding tightly to Father’s hand as He leads us each step of the way. Julaine